all this is for You

and all this is for You
it's not about me
as if You should do things my way
You alone are God



and i surrender

it fait beau temps

aujourd'hui, il y a du soleil. it fait trop chaud et alors, je suis le un peu mauvais humeur. j'adore mes camarades de clasee francais! ils sont tres interessant et anime! tous les semaines nous rencontrons et nous avons le course francais ensemble. je les aimes!!(:

maintenant, je suis tres, tres fatiguee. je ne sais pas comment je peux finir les devoirs par cette week-ends:(

i am the clay

Does not the potter have the right to make out of the same lump of clay some pottery for noble purposes and some for common use?

Does the clay say to the potter,
'What are you making?'
Does it say,
' why do i not have any handles?'

i pray for a heart of meekness and gentleness.

on my way home today, i looked out of the windows of the car and i saw a lorry packed with construction workers. some of them had their heads down sleeping, some were just enjoying the cool breeze of the night, some were just glad that another had day's work is over. u noe how we sometimes complain when we haf to squeeze in the back seat of a car? these people are sharing the back FLOOR of the lorry among like 20-25 of them. it wassen a very long moment that i saw them, since the car was travelling much faster than the lorry. but when i saw them my nose became runny, and the funny sour feeling overwhelmed me.


then i saw ANOTHER lorry with construction workers too.




Lord, do you know that i want to do so many things, but i am unable to?





then i saw a car accident.




i wonder why God is so good to me:'(

As if You should do things my way

Did you ever talk to God above
Tell Him that you need a friend to love
Pray in Jesus' name believing that
God answers prayers
Have you told Him all your cares and woes
Every tiny little fear He knows
You can know He'll always hear and
He will answer prayer
You can whisper in a crowd to Him
You can cry when you're alone to Him
You don't have to pray out loud to Him
He knows your thoughts
On a lofty mountain peak He's there
In a meadow by a stream He's there
Anywhere on earth you go
He's been there from the start

that's what i love about my Lord(=

86% for french test!God is good once again:)

too much work to be done!

going to "have-lived" (grammatically incorrect but nvm too late to think) TWO decades.

OOld..

someone is buying me a CAR.

won't you Lord, take a look at my hands

hurry come back
i need to talk to you.

unfair

be it in a love relationship,










or a friendship,














the one who wins,











never gets hurt.












but the one who gets hurts the most,












without anyone knowing what he/she has gone through..











ends up losing.











so unfair.
when u lose a friend, you get hurt the most, yet the person who gets her never gets hurt.
when u lose your partner, you get hurt the most, yet the person who gets her never gets hurt.

how is it possible that the world seems so bright and happy and cheery for one,
yet seem so dead and hopless for another.

i don't understand you Lord.

anw was talking to mummy a few days back rgd my career choice, and i told her that i am willing to get into a job that will not earn much-because of the kind of research i want to do. i want to research on a poor people's disease, like malaria or hiv, diseases that no one wants to research on because it dussen pay well, it constitutes much risk. ask most docs or soon-to-be-docs what they want to specialize in, and most answers will be backed by this reason-"i want to specialize in __ beacause now, alot of pple are having these problems.." or "nowadays, singapore got alot of pple with ___. good market, i want to specialize in this" or "____ can earn alot of $.." etc. not many people know, but when i started out wanting to be a doctor, my vision (no pun intended) was to be able to earn enough $ to provide free spectacles to the poor people in the 3rd world countries, because i was so touched by the beautiful things of this earth that the Lord has given us, and i felt so sad that many poor people with poor eyesight are unable to absorb these sights that we take for granted. many pple want to be docs because they want to "make a difference", but how much of a difference, really, are you making if u are just going into this industry being a specialist or a gp etc? however being in research now, i realise that there is so much more meaning to life n careers than earning big bucks, then getting into a specialization that is considered "high class" or what not.

did you know?
-THAT ONE CHILD DIES OF MALARIA EVERY 30 SECONDS
-More than one million people die of malaria every year, mostly infants, young children and pregnant women and most of them in Africa.
-Every year, more than 500 million people become severely ill with malaria.

aren't these numbers huge enough???

i realise that i can do so much more with my life, and even if it means researching in an area which dussen offer big bucks, like malaria and hiv, im willing to take this step of faith.

because i really want to help those who cannot help themselves.

i don't want to be a doctor and earn the rich man's $.
i don't want to be a doctor and know all about the rich man's disease.
i don't want to be a doctor and cure the rich men.



i want to be the salt and light for the poor.
i want to use my knowledge and find a drug that will help the poor.
i want to change the fact that drug industries are not investing in poor people's disease research because think about it:

if they found a drug to cure malaria, they'd have to give it for free to those who need it = those who can't afford it.

unfair.

*disclaimer: of course i still give doctors and specialists all their due respect, esp mine. because without them, i might be dead by now. the above sharing is based on personal reflection and personal commitment to a "higher calling", if one might put it. please do not take anything personally.

je suis tres fatigue

being coughy and flu-ey is horrid:(

alors, sept semaines plus, et tout serra bien.

pourquoi j'ai tres beucoup de tests?c'est triste, je dois dire.

mon chien a peur.

not full blown

sphenoid air sinus infection.

gawsh. almost died. was so terrible i couldn't breathe.
much less talk.

but it's much better now. the antibiotics are like..POWER.

3 cheers for the scientists who invented the drug.


so much to study.
so little time.

the quebecians are funny

how come the flu never goes away,

and the tests never end?

3 french CAs, 1 french oral, 1 stats CA, 1 anatomy CA, 2 biod CAs, 1 gek CA, 1 term paper, countless tutorials and assignments before the exams.

that's NINE papers.


in the next 5 weeks.


and u think u are busy?



think AGAIN.

flu.

what am i seeking for?

the truth that will set me free.

bleeaagghhh

still sick:(

sneeze sneeze whole day so tiring.

just watched step up 2 with smoley! nice songs and super cool dancing!!i like briana evigan's body so nice(= and robert hoffman is gooooood looking:)

sigh being sick is terrible, especially when i haf so many tests and work to do:(

4 more weeks pam, and the exams. then i am free.

looking forward to UNIGE.
escape this life here.

ma vie

imaginez votre vie quand vous aurez 50ans.

quand j'aurai 50 ans, j'habiterai dans une grande maison avec un petit jardin. il y aura beaucoup de fleurs differentes dans le jardin. toujours, je predrai le cafe avec mes amies et nous jouerons des echecs ensemble. j'aurai aussi beaucoup de chiens. mon mari et moi irons souvent en vancances et nour ferons beaucoup d'activites. je n'aurai pas d'enfant, parce que j'aimerai pouvoir faire comme je voudrai. je mangerai a la restaurant tout le temps avec ma famille et nous ne nous inwuieterons jamais de n'importe quoi. ma vie sera tres relachee.

sicksicksick for how many days alrd terrible:( :(

Fievre

je suis malade
wo3 sheng1 bing4
fever:(
french ca tmr
God heal me

whee!

YAAAAAHOOOOOOOO!
85% for anat ca1!
God is good(=(=(=

votre lumière brillera

through the darkest night

His light will shine

Dieu est bon tout le temps!!(=

exciting week!wow God is really good i don't know what to say. im really so glad i know Him you know, because He is the only one whom i can turn to anytime, especially when i am alone and there's no one else beside me to share my sadness n fear. He is really almighty!

yayy 4 tests down, impt french test next week!anat was quite tough because u really really need to know your stuff!although it's mcq, 90% of the qns are like "which of the following is false?" tt kinda qns?so u haf to really know everything about everything, if u get what i mean. and stats was not too bad i just hope i interpreted his qns correctly..

and thank God for 83% on gek test 1!:)

i must really pia biodiversity and french if im heading for 4.4 this sem!

annnnnnnnddd friday was the FUNNNNNNNEEEST day of the week, and prob for this sem! we went for field trip to changi beach GAAAWSH God is good for the past week it has been raining and ytd it didn't!! thanks zoey n fren for waiting for me wah i was in the toilet and they were like "pam!!hurry the bus leaving alrd!!" wah super stress man LOL.

and we went into the sea to seine and caught lotsa cool anthropods and gastropods and crustaceans and other vertebrates and invertebrates!v v v beautiful i love them!!
of course we let them back into the sea:)we even provided them with oygenated sea water!

sea lettuce. we caught lotsa these during seining. find my favourite here!!

MY FAVOURITE!JELLYFISH!!!SO CUUUUTE!look at the prev pic to find them!
do u noe that it's edible!it's super salty though cuz it's made up of 95% (sea)water!



a school of sotong. wow alliteration!


i loooove the seahorse!

(=(=

leaf potter crab eating worm

chat noir wanting to eat the sea creatures we were studying

chat noir wanting to eat me

swimming crab

starfish

mothworm and starfish

wow super exciting!and we also saw lotsa common coastal plants like sea almond, sea hibiscus, mangrove shoots, and also barnacles, gastropods, foulers, sea urchins' tests, sesworms, wet spider etc! wow indeed very fascinating i looove!

this is what makes me happy studying what im studying. i get to see so much of God's creations, and the diversity of life around us that we don't even notice when we go to the beaches or wade in the waters!

and also, God is good because on tuesday, sci dean's office called me regarding my enquiry, and said that my allocated university is not under the LPP, tt's why it's not in opas. but that is impossible because they say that the universities in france and switzerland and belgium (french speaking ones) are under the programme! so ms s says she will check it out for me. and when i put down the phone, i was really sad and abit like fearful? because i really wanted to go to unige, and i had spent alot of effort mappiing my mods!and what was worse still, i was at home all alone, no one to talk to and to get comforted by..so i jsut started praying and asked God to take away the fear and sadness from me.my mood that day was kinda destroyed.

so on thurs i trooped down to sci dean's off and asked ms s about the prob, she said that opas has not got back to her, and that if necessary they will extend deadline(toadaY)for me if the problem is on their side. and ytd i received the email I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR telling me that the matter is solved and i can go ahead and cont to apply thru opas!wahh God is really good man He really makes all things that seems to be going bad and wrong good in His time. i think He was really testing my faith in Him, seeing if i would just give up or would i believe thaT He will make a way(=

but really..

who am i? that the Lord of all the earth
would care to know my name,
would care to feel my hurt

through the darkest night, His light will shine




thank You so much.

je ne suis pas heureux

vous sont pourquoi enlevant mon ami de moi.je ne suis pas même votre concurrent. vous sont pourquoi enlève de moi quelque chose que j'ai déjà si petit de. maintenant c'est trois à deux.

heureux?