just as i am

just yesterday i was reminded of how my saviour found me. depressed, forlorn, stressed, unhappy.. with really nothing, nothing to give.

tried many times but i just can't put into words this love that sought me out and found me.

can you imagine, he loved me when i was a total wreck, hopeless, gross, nothing beautiful, nothing to give him? and yet he thought i was the most beautiful thing.

Your grace has found me just as i am
empty handed but alive in Your hands

makes me tired of living in the hustle of this world. how i try to fit into social normalities, fit into being well-liked, try to ace in my studies, try to find a life partner..and forgetting to treasure this LIFE that i have.

what does LIFE mean to you?

was reading about how israel asked for a king, and it made me reflect. i have the Lord my God as my king, why am i asking for another? i hate myself for saying that all i want is to be with God and that God has provided me with all that i need, yet living a life as though results, a good bod, looking pretty, and acceptance means the whole world to me.

i really need to start LIVING.